A Step-by-Step Guide to Reading a Restaurant Wine List

By someone who has written hundreds of wine lists in their time

I hope you enjoy reading The Sauce as much as I enjoy writing it. This is a reader-supported publication. Your paid subscriptions mean I have the time to research and write about food culture as an independent entity. No #sponcon, no shilling products I don’t care about, just a whole lot of commentary about how food and drink fit into modern society.

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Too many restaurant wine lists are nonsensical.

They could be massive leather-bound tomes that take an hour to read (great for wine geeks or those in the industry, not so useful for newbies).

They could be a minimalist list in a hipster small-plate restaurant that reads like one of those three-ingredient food menus.

Cotat. Sancerre. 2020.

However they come, it often feels like they’re designed to purposely trip you up when all you want is a bottle of wine that isn’t going to cost the equivalent of a monthly mortgage payment and won’t take you three hours to choose.

I’ve written hundreds of wine lists in my time. Good ones, if I say so myself. Ones that give the customer what they need.

Through that, I’ve learned a thing or two about how to read them. Even the bad ones.

After this, you will too.

This is the biggest reason why it’s so hard to read wine lists (aside from “wine is complicated”)

They’re not consistent.

One restaurant might describe wines like:

Winemaker, wine name, vintage, region, country

Whereas another might prefer:

Winemaker, name of wine, sub-region, grape variety

Or even

Grape variety, region, vintage, country

Or if they’ll be inconsistent in how they write their own lists which makes it even harder to decipher what you’re looking at.

Wine is confusing and complicated enough as it is and these sorts of lists don’t make it any easier. Do they mean the region Montepulciano or the grape of the same name? With some lists it’s hard to say.

Alas as a consumer, there isn’t much you can do if a list has been written by an egotistical Sommelier or the 18-year-old weekend worker who only drinks White Claws.

All you can do is work with what you have.

Rule numero uno — visit the right restaurant

If you care about drinking well, you can forget about 95% (or more) of restaurants.

Finding the 5% is easy with this rule:

If a restaurant cares about wine, they’ll tell you.

Their Instagram will include bottle shots, not just food. They’ll post their wine list — not just their food menus — on their website.

If you can’t find anything about wine in any of a restaurant’s marketing or social media, the chances are it’s not a priority for them.

Find the restaurants that make a big song and dance about wine because they shouldn’t list anything that isn’t delicious which means you can’t go that wrong.

Throw the Sommelier a bone and use them

They’re the ones who built the wine list, so they should know exactly what’s on it. If you tell them the sort of wine you like, they should know what to recommend.

And for the love of Bacchus, don’t be afraid to tell them your budget. This was a massive pet peeve of mine in my wine bar, especially if I was working with a list of wines between $30 and $300.

Give us a ballpark figure at least.

But if there is no Somm, what do you do?

Go for the food-friendly wines

Whilst I’m not wine and food pairing’s biggest fan, I do think it’s weird that restaurants insist that you order wine before you’ve even glanced at the food menu.

Luckily for me, my favourite wines are food-friendly. Most of the time I choose them.

My practical advice is that unless you’re wedded to light whites or massive reds, fat whites and light reds are your foodie friends.

Fat whites include:

• Decent quality Chardonnay (Burgundy, Sonoma, Napa, South Africa, and Australia, all have delicious, delicious Chardonnay in their midst).

• Marsanne, Rousanne, and Grenache Blanc (varieties originally from the Rhone Valley in France but grown plenty of other places too).

• Chenin Blanc, especially the richer styles from places like South Africa or Vouvray and Saumur in France’s Loire Valley.

Light reds include:

• Gamay (the grape variety of Beaujolais).

• Cabernet Franc (the Loire Valley’s Saumur and Chinon are its home).

• Pinot Noir (Burgundy is the big one but hell, it’s planted everywhere).

• Anything that describes itself as “carbonically macerated’ or “whole bunch” (a winemaking process that generally creates a lighter style of red).

The only wine I think works better than fat white and light reds with food is dry Sherry, although that’s an acquired taste.

Aside from Sherry, if you get on the light red and fat white train, you basically can’t go wrong when it comes to pairing everything from vegetables to steak to fish.

Pro tip — if the list is big (and you actually want to read it), order a glass of wine first

Guests without a glass in front of them make wine staff nervous.

It’s our training — always make sure the customer is never waiting for booze.

But that also means that if you want to take your time over a larger-than-average wine list, the wait staff are going to bug you more than you might want.

My tip — order a glass of wine and say you need longer with the list. It takes the pressure off the staff to be “attentive” and gives you time to read the list.

Plus, you get a glass of wine pronto. Win-win.

Decide your parameters before you even sit down

Are you thinking red or white? What’s your budget? Are you in for a bottle or just a glass?

Most long wine lists will be full of what you don’t want. The wrong colour. The wrong style. The wrong price.

If you go in with even a vague idea about what you’re looking for, you can forget most of the list and concentrate on the few bottles within your parameters.

Even better…

Be THAT person — research beforehand

I won’t tell anyone if you’ve researched my wine list before you enter my restaurant or bar. It doesn’t make you an insufferable wine-bore. It makes you sensible.

With 10 minutes of Googling, you could find which wines fit your parameters. By all means, come into my place with a few bottles in mind. It makes both my and your life easier.

And less time reading the wine list on the night means more time with your companions.

Sounds like a good trade-off to me.

If you REALLY haven’t a clue, remember these tips

If it all looks like Klingon to you, this will help:

Ignore the old advice of avoiding the second wine on the list

It’s a debunked myth that restaurants heavily mark up second cheapest wine on the list. It’s not going to rip you off so don’t waste your time worrying about it.

Don’t be embarrassed to order the house wine

The amount of people who were embarrassed to order my house wine was staggering.

Take it from me — we don’t care. In fact, if you make too much of a thing about it, you might offend us because it infers you think we’re palming you off with crappy wine.

We’re not.

Good restaurants will have good house pours. Their Somm will probably have spent a lot of time finding something good at the right price. They will never be bothered about you buying it.

Ever.

Avoid big-name regions at lower price points

I’ve seen enough wine-list tick-boxing exercises to make me cry.

You know the sort. There has to be a New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc. There must be a Chianti. Ditto Rioja, Napa Valley, Australian Shiraz.

Oh, and they all have to be under $30.

Low-priced big names are almost never worth your money. Your better option is to go for a smaller region few people have heard of (even possibly you) at the same price as the famous region.

I’ve drunk enough shit Champagne for the same price as decent Cava to know how important this rule is.

Go Greens!

Much like when you haven’t a clue in a wine store, if you spy an organic wine on a restaurant list, order it.

This isn’t me being dogmatic about organic wine, this is me reminding you that organic wine has to adhere to higher standards than conventional wine. It doesn’t mean it’s better than all conventional wine, but you’re reducing your odds of ordering something wimpy or simply terrible.

If you only remember three things from the last 1600 words, remember this:

• Choose the right restaurant.

• Use the Somm if there is one.

• Go for food-friendly wines (fat whites, light reds).

Many restaurants don’t make choosing wine easy. There are politics involved with wine lists. Everything from tensions between the Sommelier and the owner to inexperienced wine buyers.

None of this is right. Nothing should make your life hard in restaurants.

After all, you pay a lot to be there and it’s meant to be fun.

Good wine makes it more fun. This will help.